There Goes My Life
by Marissa-Xtreme SelDem Fan
Summary: All he saw were his dreams going up in smoke... His life was over. Okay, I REALLY suck at summaries so just please read the story and tell me what you think!
1. Nothing More Than Friends

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! Now I know you must be wondering where I've been all these months without any updates to ITPOAA, but I assure you that I am still working on the next chapter for that story. It's just been a really hard chapter to write with all the drama and stuff and lack of inspiration, not to mention college and work and studying take up a majority of my time. I don't know why I am posting this story when I obviously have ITPOAA to work on and a busy schedule, but I felt compelled to post this story. While Laley and Baley are my two favorite couples, I have always loved the idea of Nathan and Brooke with each other so this story is a Brathan, or as I like to call it, Nookie. This story is based off of Kenny Chesney's song, "There Goes My Life." I suggest you listen to the song or read the lyrics before you read the story. This story takes place after Brooke finds out about Peyton and Lucas and Haley goes on tour. They are in their senior year. You can basically get the gist of the story by listening to the song, but I plan to add a few of my own little twists to make it unique. Anywho, I'll let you get to reading the story. As always, please read and review!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. One Tree Hill and its characters are property of the CW.

**Rating: **K+ to T

**There Goes My Life **

**Chapter 1 – Nothing More Than Friends **

Shaking, with her arms wrapped around herself, Brooke trudged up the steps to his house, dreading the conversation she was about to have. She knocked lightly on the door then waited while she tapped her foot nervously. He answered the door a few minutes later and his piercing blue eyes gazed into hers with confusion in them. "Brooke, what are you doing here," he asked. "I-I um," she began, dropping her gaze to her hands before she looked back up at him, "Can we talk?" "Sure," he responded as he stepped aside and gestured her in. She shook her head, "Not here." He nodded and followed her outside as they walked along the familiar sidewalks of the town they had lived in their whole lives.

"What's up, Brooke," he asked after a few minutes of silence, wondering what it was that she needed to talk to him about. "Um, about that night..." she bit her bottom lip as she stared at her hands again, fiddling nervously with them. "Brooke, you said you didn't want to talk about that night ever again, that it was a mistake and you just wanted to forget about it," he replied, confused as to why she was dredging up the past. "I-I did, I just...I can't stop thinking about it... What we did has consequences..." Brooke choked up and tears welled in her eyes as she hugged herself even tighter, "I-I'm pregnant, Nathan."

He stopped short and looked at her with wild eyes, "W-What?" "I said-" she started but he cut her off. "I heard what you said," he responded, holding up his hand, "Are-Are you sure?" "Two pregnancy tests and about three weeks late say I am," Brooke replied as the tears spilled onto her cheeks and down her face, "What are we going to do?" Nathan let out a large sigh as he ran a hand through his hair then rubbed his face, "I don't know. Do you want this baby, Brooke?" She gazed at him with confusion in her eyes and an angry glare, "How can you ask me that? I am not going to get an abortion, Nathan. I can't believe you- You know what? Forget it. If you don't want to be a part of this baby's life then fine, I'll raise the baby on my own," Brooke shook her head as more tears filled her eyes and she turned from him, starting to walk away, "I knew I shouldn't have expected anything more… You are Dan Scott's son after all." She choked on a sob before she started to run away from him.

A million things were running through Nathan's mind at the speed of light. He was too young for this. He wasn't ready to be a father; he's only 17. He's just a kid. How is he going to raise one? He saw all his dreams going up in smoke. He was supposed to get out of Tree Hill, away from his lunatic of a father. Basketball was a way out for him. He had promised himself that he would never be like his father yet here he had followed in his footsteps and gotten a girl pregnant. So when Brooke's last words reached his ears, he made a new promise. He vowed that he would be there for Brooke and their child. He would take care of them. He would be a better man than his father was.

"Brooke, wait," he called as he rushed to catch up to her. "Leave me alone Nathan. You've said all you needed to say," she started to run faster. "No I haven't," he replied as he grabbed her arm. Brooke turned around to face him and tried to pull her arm from his grasp, "Nathan, let go of me." "No, not until we talk about this," he responded. "I think you pretty much gave me your answer, Nate," she wiped some tears from her eyes, "Please let me go." "I want to be in this baby's life, Brooke," Nathan said as he loosened his grip and gently pulled her towards a nearby bench, "here, come sit." "Don't lie to me Nate," Brooke responded, "you wanted me to get an abortion." "That's not what I meant when I said that, Brooke," he replied, still keeping his hand around her arm just in case she tried to run, "I was just trying to get a feel on our options. If you want to have this baby, Brooke, then we'll have it. I'll be there for you and the baby." She looked up at him with glistening eyes, "Really?" He nodded and gave her a small little half-smile. She returned her own uncertain smile as she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him, "Thanks Nate."

They sat in silence for a few moments before Brooke looked up at him and asked with a wavering voice, "Nate, will you come to my house with me and stay for a little while? I really don't want to be alone right now." "Of course," he responded as he stood then helped Brooke to her feet. They walked side by side back to Brooke's house and she let them in with her keys then tossed them along with her purse on the table beside the door. "Home sweet home," Brooke sighed as she stared around the quiet, empty house then replied, "Come on, let's go up to my room." They started to ascend the steps but when she neared the middle of the staircase, Brooke pressed a hand to her forehead and took an unsteady step backwards. Nathan was right behind her and he wrapped an arm around her waist to keep her from falling, "Careful." "I-I just felt a little dizzy that's all," she responded shakily. "Let's get you up to bed," he replied as he slowly guided her up the rest of the stairs and into her room.

"I'm going to change into something more comfortable," Brooke said as she went to her dresser and tried to find something to wear. "Do you think that's wise? I mean, with you feeling dizzy and you'll be alone in the bathroom…" "I won't lock it," a small smirk played on her lips and he saw a bit of the old Brooke reappear, "I could change in here if you want." A light tint rose to Nathan's cheeks and he replied quickly, "No, that's okay. Just call me if you feel dizzy or sick, okay? I don't want anything to happen to you." She gave him a small smile before she retreated to the bathroom. Once inside, Brooke leaned against the counter and choked back a sob so Nathan wouldn't hear. He didn't care about her. He only cared about the baby she was carrying inside of her. He wasn't attracted to her anymore. It had only been one night of passion but in those few hours they spent together, she felt as if he loved her. How foolish she had been. Now she was just an incubator to him.

She was brought out of her thoughts by a knock on the bathroom door. "Brooke, are you okay? You've been in there for five minutes," his voice sounded worried. "Christ Nate, can't I use the toilet and wash my face? I don't need you hounding me every minute. Is this the way it's going to be through the rest of this pregnancy? Because I'm telling you right now that I won't stand for it," she finished changing her clothes and threw open the bathroom door. An expression of relief washed over his face, "No, I was just worried. You were feeling dizzy. I just wanted to make sure you were alright." Brooke sighed as she pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, "I'm sorry. I'm just not used to having someone look over my shoulder, looking out for me. I've lived a majority of my life alone. It's going to take some getting used to but don't do it too much. It's annoying." "I'll try to work on it," he grinned as he grabbed her forearm and led her towards the bed. He pulled the sheets back and allowed her to get in then he covered her up to her shoulders. "You get some rest," he replied then turned away and headed towards the door. A hurt expression flashed across her face as she asked, "I thought you were going to stay." He turned back to face her and he saw the uncertainty in her eyes, "Oh no, Brooke. I'm not leaving. I'm just going downstairs to get some water. I'll be right back up." "Okay," she responded quietly.

When he returned, Nathan saw Brooke curled up and she looked about ready to cry. "Hey, what's wrong," he asked concernedly as he walked over and sat on the edge of the bed, beginning to rub her back in slow circles. "What are we going to do, Nate? We're only seventeen. How can we take care of a baby if we can barely take care of ourselves," she inquired with glistening eyes as she craned her head to look at him. "We'll figure it out. We're in this together, okay? We've got about seven months to figure it out. Right now, just get some rest," he replied as he dropped his hand from her back and moved to a chair near the bed. "You aren't going to lay down with me," she asked. "I'm not tired. Don't worry, I'll be right here. I'm not leaving. I just need to think about things for awhile," he responded as he ran a hand through his hair. "Okay," she replied meekly, "Nate, will you rub my back some more?" "Sure," he answered, moving back to his previous position on the bed. "Thanks," she said quietly as she closed her eyes. He rubbed her back in small circles and long strokes until he felt her breathing slow and even out. She was asleep. He then returned to the chair to contemplate what Brooke had said.

Hours later, Brooke's eyes slowly fluttered open. The day's waning sunlight drifted from the opening in her curtains, signaling that it was already late afternoon. Her eyes searched the room for Nathan but she didn't have to look far. She found him hunched over in the chair, his face buried in his hands. "Hey," she whispered hoarsely, trying to get his attention. His head shot up and she saw the worry in his eyes, his forehead wrinkled in concern. "Thank god, you're alright. You slept for a long time. I wanted to wake you up to see if you were okay but I knew you needed to sleep. How are you feeling?" "Better. I was just exhausted. I wasn't feeling too great this morning and with my emotions being out of whack and all the stress…I just really needed to sleep. Thank you," she responded. "No problem," he replied then scooted the chair closer to the bed, "Listen, we need to talk. I thought about some things while you were sleeping and I want to discuss them with you." "Okay…" she said warily. "I want you to move in with me," Nathan stated and Brooke started to say something but he stopped her, "but before you say anything, let me explain. I don't want you to be alone in this big house; you could get hurt. You could have fallen down the stairs today Brooke, had I not been there to help you. I don't want anything to happen to you or the baby and I would feel much better if you moved in with me so I can make sure that nothing does."

Brooke was silent for a few minutes as she thought this over then responded, "Okay, I'll move in with you." "You will," he asked, a smile spreading across his face. "Yeah, I mean, I won't be able to live here for very long. Once my dad finds out that I'm pregnant, I'll be out the door. He'll disown me," Brooke said as she sat up in the bed and folded her legs. "Yeah, Dan's gonna flip. It's a good thing I'm already emancipated," he let out a soft chuckle. "I'll need to get a job too. Dad will cut me off from the Davis Family bank accounts so I won't have his money to live off of and we'll need things for the baby," Brooke responded. "I don't want you working while you're pregnant," Nathan said adamantly, "It's too much stress on you. You could get hurt. Something could happen. I'll just have to get another job." "Nathan, no. You can't work two jobs when you have school and basketball too. I don't want all the responsibility to fall on you. We're in this together, remember? I'll find a job that's easy. I'll be careful, I promise," she responded. He gazed at her warily for several seconds before he sighed, "I don't like the idea of you working but I need to stay on the basketball team. Basketball is my only way out of this town."

Brooke nodded in response as thoughts ran through her head. "Nathan…" she began hesitantly then looked up at him, "What about us?" "You and the baby will come with me of course. I know how much you've always wanted to get out of Tree Hill too," he replied. "No Nathan, I mean…" she responded quietly, "I mean us, you and me." He stared at her for a moment, surprised, "Do you want there to be an us? We don't have to be together, to be together. What I mean is, we don't have to be together, boyfriend and girlfriend, to raise a baby together. We can just be two friends living together and raising the baby together. I mean, if you want us to be together…" "No, you're right," Brooke responded, closing her eyes briefly to fight the tears welling behind them. Nathan tried to hide the expression of hurt flash across his face when she said this. He was hoping that she would have said yes. This was going to be torture for him. What had he gotten himself into? He was going to be living with the girl he loved, the girl he was going to have a baby with, and he couldn't touch her. They were only friends, nothing more.


	2. New Beginnings

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! I'm back with another chapter! Sorry it took a while to get it up. I was having trouble uploading the chapter the past few days. Not really much to say other than there's some DRAMA in this chapter! Anyways, I hope you like it! As always, please read and review!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. One Tree Hill and its characters are property of the CW.

**Rating: **K+ to T

**There Goes My Life**

**Chapter 2 – New Beginnings**

Over the next few days, Brooke and Nathan spent a lot of time talking. Brooke went to the hospital and got her pregnancy confirmed by a doctor. She was eight weeks along and the baby was healthy. They decided that they would keep the news of the baby under wraps until she started showing, which wouldn't be too long. They were currently at Brooke's house and they were packing up her stuff into boxes so they could move it over to Nathan's apartment. Brooke was getting frustrated. Nathan was hardly letting her do anything. She heaved a sigh as she picked up a small box of clothes and began to take it out to Nathan's car. "Brooke, what are you doing?! Put that box down! You shouldn't be carrying heavy boxes around in your condition," Nathan shouted as he rushed over to her and took the box from her hands. "Dammit Nathan! I'm not incapable! I'm still able to do things while I'm pregnant. It was just a small, light box. The doctor said I can't lift or carry anything over fifty pounds. This over-protectiveness is getting downright irritating," Brooke growled as she pushed past him and rushed down the stairs, disappearing into the kitchen.

Nathan put down the box and followed after her but there was no sign of her in the kitchen. "Brooke," he called out concernedly. He searched the house but Brooke was nowhere to be found. He began to get worried. He decided to look outside and he exhaled a large breath when he found her in the backyard, sitting sideways on a bench swing off to the side of the pool in the grass. He approached her cautiously, not wanting to upset her more. "Brooke," he inquired softly. She pulled her legs close to her chest, giving him room to sit. "I-I'm sorry," she sniffled, wiping some of her tears away, "my emotions are all over the place. I don't know how I'll react from one situation to the next. I don't know if I'll be sad or angry or happy… I have no control over my emotions and I hate it. I didn't mean to snap at you. I just… I need to live my life normally. I'm being careful but it doesn't mean I have to live my life with a cloud of fear hanging over my head, or in this case, you and your worrying. You're going to get wrinkles on your forehead if you worry too much."

Nathan chuckled softly and pushed a stray strand of hair behind her ear, "I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to yell at you like that. I just don't want anything to happen to you or the baby. You have to understand that you can't do everything you used to when you're pregnant." "I know. I guess I'm still trying to get used to the idea that I'm pregnant. It still seems a little unreal, you know? That there's a little life growing inside of me," she gently laid a hand on her flat stomach. "Yeah," Nathan responded as he stared at her stomach too. "Do you want a boy or a girl," she asked a few moments later. "I would love a little boy to teach and play basketball with but a little girl would be great too. It doesn't really matter as long as the baby is healthy," Nathan replied, "What about you?" "I would love to have a little girl to talk to and play dress-up and take on shopping trips with me, but a boy would be nice. I agree with you though, as long as the baby is healthy, I don't care." A slightly uneasy silence fell between them as Nathan stared off into space and Brooke kept her eyes on her hands.

A few minutes later, Brooke ran her hand against the worn wood of the bench swing then looked up at him, "Nathan?" "Yeah," he inquired, breaking from his trance and gazing at her. "Can we take this with us," she asked softly, looking down at the bench again. It held so many memories and stories for her. It was her comfort spot where she liked to think or when she was upset or when she wanted to ponder life's questions. Nathan chuckled, "I'm afraid not. It won't fit in the apartment." He thought she was joking but when he saw her crestfallen expression, he suggested, "maybe we can move it somewhere else where you can have access to it. I don't think the landlord will let us put it outside the complex. Do you have any ideas of where to put it?" "What about under the tree near the rivercourt by the water? That way I can come watch you play basketball and I can look out over the water too. The river is so peaceful. Do you think we would be allowed to put it there," she asked uncertainly. "I don't see why not. It's a public park," he replied. "Yay," Brooke clapped her hands and bounced a little in her seat. He laughed at her happiness then gently grabbed her arm, "Come on, you said you wanted to help so I'm going to put you to work. At the rate I'm going now, we won't get everything done before it gets dark. Light stuff, nothing heavy, and no lifting. Leave that to me." He pointed a finger warningly at her. "I promise," she replied as she struggled to get off the bench swing and Nathan helped her up from it, "Thanks." Together, they walked back into the house to finish packing up.

Once they loaded Nathan's car as full as they could, they headed over to his apartment. Nathan brought all the boxes in then collapsed with a thud onto the couch, letting out a groan, "God, you have a lot of stuff." "Sorry," Brooke responded as she walked over to the refrigerator and opened it up to find something to drink, "You need to go grocery shopping. There's only beer, Gatorade, pickles, olives, hot dogs, and what looks like a questionable bottle of milk. I don't understand how you can live like this. Yuck!" She stuck out her tongue in disgust. "I'm sorry. I'll have to clean that out. I guess I'll have to start living better now that you're here," he chuckled, "We'll go shopping together tomorrow so we can both get stuff that we like." "Okay," she replied then asked, "Can I have one of your Gatorades?" "Sure, you're welcome to anything you like. You live here now," he smiled back at her. "Well, I would have something else, if there were anything else to drink. I can't drink beer, remember? And I don't even want to know how old that milk is." "I'll go throw it out now," he hopped up from the couch and took it outside down to the dumpster.

"There, better now," he asked when he returned. "Much," she replied, "so, do you want to start unpacking?" Nathan groaned, "No, not right now. Let me have a little time to recuperate. Let's get something to eat. Are you hungry?" "I could eat," she replied with a nod, "what kind of food do you want to get?" Nathan shook his head, "It doesn't matter to me. You got any requests?" "Mexican sounds good. What about Taco Bell? I could go for one of their Burrito Supremes and their Mexican pizza, oh, and their Grande nachos are pretty good too. I'm getting hungrier just thinking about it," Brooke grinned as she rubbed her stomach in anticipation. "Geez, that's a lot of food," Nathan remarked, "Where do you put it all?" Brooke's smile turned into a pout and she crossed her arms over her chest, staring down at her stomach, mumbling, "I'm eating for two now, you know." "Oh Brooke, I'm sorry, I didn't mean...I wasn't implying..." Nathan rushed to correct himself before she got upset again.

"It's okay," Brooke sucked in a deep breath as she fiddled with her fingers in her lap, "I know I'm going to get fat. I just didn't…" Nathan quickly moved to sit beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder, "Hey, you are not fat Brooke. You're pregnant. That's a baby growing inside of you." "Mhmm," Brooke squeaked out as she nodded meekly then wrapped her arms around his neck. Nathan wrapped his arms around her and hugged her close to him, "It's going to be okay. Everything is going to be alright." "How can you be so sure," she sniffled. "I'm not so sure right now, but I have faith that things will work out. We will be okay." After a few more seconds, Brooke pulled away and gave him a watery smile. Nathan lifted his hand and gently wiped away her tears with his thumb.

She stared into his eyes for a few moments then turned away, getting up from the couch, "I'm going to get changed into my pajamas. I'll be back in a couple minutes." "Okay," he responded, a pang of disappointment rising in his chest. He saw her pick up one of the small boxes and called out concernedly, "Brooke?" She rolled her eyes as she turned around, "Don't worry, it's just a light box. It has my undergarments in it." Her cheeks tinted a slight pink at these words. Nathan tried to hide the blush creeping in and he got up from the couch too, "Alright, well I'm gonna go get the food. I'll be back in a little while. Will you be okay by yourself?" "Yes Nathan," Brooke sighed heavily. "Call me if you need anything," he responded as he grabbed his keys and headed towards the front door. "I will," she replied as she walked down the hall to the spare bedroom that had been designated as hers. Nathan stood there for a moment, looking after her retreating form, before he turned the door knob and left the apartment.

Nathan returned forty-five minutes later and he found the living room empty. "Brooke," he called out concernedly. "In the bathroom," he heard her muffled voice. He rushed to the door and quickly opened it. He found her on the floor, hunched over and throwing up into the toilet. He crouched down beside her and started to rub her back in soothing circles, "Are you okay?" "It's called morning sickness for a reason," Brooke grumbled when she finally stopped and leaned against the side of the bathtub. "You said the doctor told you it could happen any time of the day. Some women have it all day long. Be grateful for that," he told her as he stood and wetted a washcloth then crouched down on one knee and gently pressed it against her forehead. Brooke closed her eyes in relief as she felt the coolness calming her burning skin. "Thanks," she replied after a few minutes. He helped her to her feet and led her out of the bathroom, "I'm guessing you don't feel like eating now." "No, not particularly," Brooke responded as she wrapped her arms around her stomach, "just save my food for tomorrow. I don't feel very well so I'm going to lie down on the couch for awhile." "Alright, do you need anything," he asked. "No, I'm fine. I just need to lie down," she replied. "Okay," Nathan responded as he went to the kitchen to eat his dinner.

Once he was done eating, Nathan returned to the living room and sat on the edge of the couch where Brooke was lying, "How are you feeling?" "A little better, but I'm still a bit tired," she replied hoarsely. "I know you're probably still not that hungry, but you should try to eat something. I made you some chicken noodle soup. Can you try to eat a little of it?" She nodded and he went to go get the tray he had made up for her. "Thanks, this all looks great," Brooke said sincerely. "No problem," he responded as he sat down in an armchair adjacent to the couch, "Do you want to watch a movie?" "Sure," she responded after she had taken a sip of the warm soup and let it travel down her throat, "Mmm, this is good." "Any preferences," he asked. "Just nothing too bloody or gory," Brooke scrunched her face in disgust. They finally settled on a comedy and when the movie was over, Nathan noticed that Brooke was fast asleep.

He turned off the television and cleaned up a bit, bringing the dirty dishes to the kitchen sink. He went back over to the couch and stared at Brooke for a moment. Realizing that it must be uncomfortable for her lying on that couch, Nathan decided to move her. He carefully picked her up and carried her down the hallway. Brooke's bedroom wasn't ready yet so he decided to let Brooke sleep in his bedroom and he would take the couch. He gently laid her down on his bed and noticed that she had goose bumps all over her arms and legs. He realized that she was cold and retrieved one of his nightshirts from his dresser drawer. He cautiously lifted her upper torso, not wanting to wake her, and slid the shirt under her, carefully sliding her arms through the long sleeves. He then pulled the covers up over her body to just below her shoulders and slowly leaned down, placing a light kiss on her forehead. "Goodnight Brooke," he whispered.

The next morning Nathan was making pancakes for breakfast when he heard a knock at the door. He wondered who would be coming around at this hour as he walked towards the door. When he opened it, he found his brother standing in front of him with a worried look on his face. "Hey Nate, have you seen Brooke? I can't find her. She's not at her house and I really need to talk to her," he said anxiously. At that moment, Brooke entered the living room with her eyes closed shut and she was holding a hand to her forehead, "Nathan, why did I wake up in your bed? Last thing I remember was that we were watching a movie and I was lying on the couch." Lucas saw that Brooke was wearing one of Nathan's shirts and he took in what Brooke had said then he felt his heart shatter to pieces. His ex-girlfriend, the girl he still loved, had slept with his brother. Brooke opened her eyes slightly when she received no answer and she caught a glimpse of blonde hair as her ex-boyfriend ran out the door.

"Lucas, wait!" Brooke called out as she ran after him. He only ran faster. "Lucas Scott! Do not make me run after you in my bare feet!" Lucas finally slowed down and stopped, waiting for her to catch up to him. "What do you want Brooke," he asked coldly. "That back there…" she heaved labored breaths as she tried to regain a normal breathing rhythm, "It isn't what it looks like…" "Really? Because it looks a lot like you're sleeping with him," he retorted nastily as he pointed to the shirt she was wearing, "How could you do this to me Brooke?" "How could I do this to you? First of all Lucas, I am not sleeping with Nathan. Second, we are not together anymore. Even if I were sleeping with Nathan, which I am not, it's none of your business. Thirdly, it was you who cheated on me. You remember Peyton, don't you," she returned icily. "I can't believe you're throwing that back in my face! I said that I was sorry! I can't even believe I was going to come tell you that I wanted us to be together again. I thought you loved me," he looked at her with desperate eyes, filled with tears.

"Lucas, I do love you," tears rose to Brooke's eyes too. "Then let's be together again. We both still love each other. We can make it work this time," he said softly as he took her hand into his own. "I love you Lucas, but I can't be with you again," Brooke responded as she pulled her hand from his and took a few steps back. "Why? Why can't we be together again," he asked confusedly. "Because we just can't," Brooke cried as she turned around and started to walk away, "I'm sorry." "Brooke," he called out. "No Lucas," she replied back, "don't come after me. It will just make it harder to let you go." "But Brooke, I love you," he said desperately. "I know you do, Lucas, and I love you too. But sometimes love isn't enough…" With that, Brooke started to run back to Nathan's apartment, which was now her home.

Before she went back into the apartment, Brooke wiped away the tears that had fallen from her eyes. She loved Lucas; she would always love him. He was her first true love and she would never forget the way he made her feel. He made her feel beautiful and confident. Despite being the most popular girl in school, Brooke had trust issues. It was no wonder because of her nonexistent parents. She always felt insecure and she knew she was pretty, but Lucas made her feel beautiful inside and out, that there was more to her than just a pretty face. She probably would have forgiven him for cheating on her eventually. However, things were different now. Her life had changed; she had changed. She was a different person now. She was a mom; at least she was going to be. Brooke's lips curved into a smile as she looked down and rested her hand against her stomach. She had Nathan now too. Of course they weren't together but Nathan had been more caring and concerned about her in the last few days than anybody in her whole life. Granted, she knew he was more concerned about the baby than he was her, but it felt nice just the same.

Brooke took a deep breath as she felt some of the weight she'd been carrying lift from her shoulders. Breaking up with Lucas, for good, had been somewhat liberating. She could finally close that chapter in her book and finally let him go. She could start over. She was glad because even though she and Lucas were not together, she had begun to feel guilty for the feelings she was starting to feel for Nathan, as if she were betraying Lucas somehow. Brooke knew Nathan didn't share the same feelings, but she could rest easy knowing that he would always be in her life, forever bound together by the child growing inside of her. They were just friends raising their baby together. She could live with that as long as Nathan stayed in her life because she didn't know what she would do without him. He had been her rock so far and she needed his support. She didn't know if she would be able to raise this baby alone. She needed him to be there for her.

She opened the door and entered the apartment with a smile on her face. However, it turned into a frown when she saw Nathan shoving pots and throwing cooking utensils into the sink with an angry look on his face. "Nathan, what's wrong," she asked concernedly as she approached him. He stopped and lifted his gaze, glaring at her, "You went back to him, didn't you?" "Nathan, I-" she shook her head. "Don't lie to me, Brooke," he yelled and she flinched back, "I saw you two holding hands! How could you do this to me? How could you mess with my head? I thought we were going to raise our baby together!" "We are going to raise the baby together, Nathan," Brooke replied, tears forming in her eyes. "Dammit," Nathan pounded his fist into the counter then said in a cold voice, "Get out." "What," Brooke sucked in a deep breath at his words. "I said get out," Nathan shouted as he pointed towards the door, an angry look upon his face. "Nathan, I-" she started as tears fell down her cheeks. She saw his jaw clench and decided not to press any further. She quickly grabbed her purse and keys then ran out the door.


	3. A Place to Call Home

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! Sorry it has taken so long to update this story. Life has been hectic and busy the past few weeks and wouldn't let me upload again, argh. College has been riding my butt with lots of assignments and papers since it is getting near the end of the semester (two more weeks! Yay!) Plus, I got a new dog so I've been spending time with her, training and playing with her. Her name is Baley, and yes, I spell it like my favorite girl couple, Brooke + Haley Baley :) It might be about two weeks before I can update again because, like I said, the semester is coming to an end so that means finals which also means that I will have to hunker down and really focus on studying instead of writing this story, which I would rather be doing more. Anyways, I hope you like this chapter! As always, please read and review!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. One Tree Hill and its characters are property of the CW.

**Rating: **K+ to T

**There Goes My Life**

**Chapter 3 – A Place to Call Home **

Brooke had no idea where to go. She couldn't go back to her house because she no longer lived there. Peyton was out of the picture, for obvious reasons, and Haley was gone, following her dreams on a tour bus more than a thousand miles away. She knew she couldn't go to Lucas. She had just broken up with him and it would only make Nathan angrier with her if he found out. Brooke choked on a sob as she drove aimlessly through the streets of Tree Hill. How could Nathan think she would get back together with Lucas? They had promised each other they would raise their baby together. He had promised that he would be there for her and their baby. Now she was alone. They were alone. She had no one and didn't know where to turn to for comfort and support.

Brooke finally decided to go see Karen. While she and Lucas were dating, Brooke and Karen had become close, and she thought of Karen as sort of a surrogate mother, the mother she never had, as Karen thought of her as a daughter. Brooke was apprehensive to go to her though. Things were different now. She was no longer dating her son. Brooke hoped desperately that Karen wouldn't turn her away. Karen was the only person who could understand her and what she was going through.

When she reached Karen's house, Brooke knocked lightly on the door, hoping that Lucas wasn't home. It was too soon to see him after she had just broken up with him for good. A few moments later, Karen answered the door. Her happy expression changed to one of concern when she saw that Brooke was upset. "Brooke… What's wrong, honey," she asked as she engulfed the crying girl in her arms. Brooke laid her head on Karen's shoulder and cried even harder as she relished in the feel of the older woman's strong arms around her. "I-I didn't know where else to go," Brooke choked on a sob as she gripped her tighter. Never relinquishing her hold on the younger girl, Karen guided them into the house and sat them down on the living room couch. "Tell me what's wrong, sweetie," Karen demanded gently as she brushed some hair away from her face. Brooke shut her eyes tightly as a few tears spilled onto her cheeks, reliving the fight with Nathan in her head. "I-I-I'm pregnant, Karen," Brooke began to sob as she buried her face in her hands, "I'm sorry. I-I just- I didn't have anywhere else to go… You were the first person I could think of… I screwed up so bad…"

Karen gasped and let out the breath slowly then wrapped her arms around the girl and comforted her as she rocked her gently back and forth, "Sh… You are not a screw-up, Brooke. You listen to me, okay? I'm glad you came to me. You're like a daughter to me, Brooke." Brooke looked up at her with a teary expression and gave her a small smile. "Have you told Lucas yet," Karen asked softly as she rubbed her back. Brooke looked down at her hands, more tears welling in her eyes as she shook her head, "It's not Lucas' baby, Karen. I got pregnant after we broke up. I'm eight weeks along." "Do you know who-" Karen began gently, but Brooke interrupted her. "Nathan's the father," Brooke whispered. "Have you told him," the older woman inquired. Brooke choked on a sob as she nodded, "I-I told him about a week ago. He was so great about everything, Karen. He was understanding. He wanted to be in the baby's life. He wanted me to move in with him so he could look after me and the baby. I agreed and we moved my things over to his apartment yesterday… Then this morning Lucas came by and he-he wanted to get back together with me… I told him I couldn't be with him again and when I went back to the apartment, Nathan was angry. He thought Lucas and I were together again… I tried to explain, but-but he yelled at me and told me to get out…" Brooke buried her face into Karen's shoulder as the sobs began to overtake her.

"I'm sure he didn't mean it, sweetie," Karen tried to soothe the distraught girl by softly stroking her hair and rubbing small circles on her back, "He was upset. He jumped to conclusions. I'm sure he's worried sick about you. He'll calm down then you two can talk." Brooke shook her head but immediately stopped and covered her mouth when she felt the nausea begin to settle in her stomach, "I need to use the bathroom." Karen nodded and followed after her, holding her hair back when she started to retch into the toilet. Once she was done, Karen offered her a wet washcloth to wipe her mouth. "I can't see him, Karen, not right now. I just- I can't talk to him…" "It's okay. You don't have to right now if you don't want to, but you need to talk to him sometime. You should get some rest. All this stress isn't good for the baby. I'll fix up Lucas' bed for you with some new sheets and pillows. The couch really isn't good for your back." "Thank you Karen," Brooke wrapped her arms around the older woman's neck. "No problem sweetie," Karen patted her back then helped her to her feet.

Once Brooke was alone in Lucas' room, she felt uncomfortable. She felt weird being there and lying in his bed when they were no longer together. Despite this, she shifted around a little, trying to find a good position to fall asleep. Tears slipped out of her closed eyes as she relived the fight over and over in her head. How could Nathan think that she would go back to Lucas? After all their talks and discussions and plans about the baby? She hoped he hadn't really meant to kick her out of the apartment. She needed him, now more than ever. She had a baby on the way and he was the only person she could turn to, well, maybe besides Karen. That brought her to another thought. She would have to tell people soon, if her growing stomach didn't tell them first. How would people react? She'd have to tell her parents soon too, as well as Nathan's parents, Dan and Deb. Brooke had to admit that Dan scared her. She knew he would react badly to the news. He would try to turn Nathan against her; make Nathan leave her because having a baby with his dreams so close would ruin his life. Brooke choked back a sob. She couldn't lose Nathan. He was her rock. She couldn't raise this baby alone. Brooke gently laid a hand on her stomach as she turned her head to look out the window, tears streaming down her face, "I need your daddy, baby. I can't do this without him." Wiping her face with the sleeve of her shirt, Brooke turned on her side and closed her eyes.

A few minutes later, Brooke's eyes shot open when she felt a hand cover her own on her stomach. "Lucas, what are you doing?" Brooke scooted back as she pushed his hand away. "Brooke, why didn't you tell me," Lucas whispered, tears forming in his eyes, "Why did you tell me you couldn't be with me again? Was it because of the baby? Were you planning on leaving Tree Hill with my child and never tell me?" His voice rose in volume as anger surged through him. Brooke slowly sat up and stared at her hands in her lap, fiddling with them nervously, "The baby isn't yours, Luke." "You cheated on me," Lucas shouted in shock, "I can't believe this! You are such a hypocrite! You don't hesitate to bash me about how I cheated on you with Peyton and here you were cheating on me?" Brooke slapped his cheek, "How dare you! I was faithful to you every single day of our relationship! Don't you dare accuse me of cheating! Who's the hypocrite? For your information, I got pregnant after we broke up. You missed the train, buddy. Consider yourself lucky. You aren't forced into a loveless relationship and you aren't forced to take responsibility of a child that you probably don't even want even if it were yours!"

"Then why the hell are you here? Why are you laying in my bed? Who's the father? Do you even know who he is," Lucas returned nastily. Brooke slapped his other cheek, "I came here to see your mother, jackass. I needed her advice. She has experience about this kind of situation, you know. I started to feel sick so your mother said I could rest in your room." "Who's the father," Lucas growled. Brooke became nervous and stared at her hands again, "Nathan is." Lucas totally blew it. "God Brooke, my own brother?! How could you do that to me? Were Nathan and Haley even broken up? How long has this been going on behind my back? Dammit!" Lucas turned and punched his hand into the wall. "You cheated on me with my best friend!" Lucas leaned his head back and rolled his eyes, "Here we go again. How long are you going to keep throwing that in my face?" "What is going on in here," Karen asked crossly as she entered the room. "It was one time. I didn't do it to spite you, Lucas. Nathan and I were both lonely and we found comfort in each other for a night. I didn't expect it to happen. It just did," Brooke whispered, starting to cry again. Karen went over to Brooke and wrapped her arms around her, "Sh… Brooke, remember I told you that stress isn't good for the baby." "I know," Brooke whimpered. "Lucas, leave, now," Karen ordered as she pointed towards the door. Lucas grabbed his basketball from the floor near his dresser and left the room without another word or second glance. Brooke buried her face in Karen's shoulder.

"Come on, let's get you into bed. You need to rest and get some sleep," Karen guided her back to the bed and helped her lie down, pulling the covers over her. "I don't know if I can," Brooke said as she sniffled and rubbed her face. "You can try," Karen gave her a wry smile then pushed some hair out of Brooke's face, "I bet you're exhausted. Sleep will come. Would some soft music help?" Brooke nodded and Karen turned on the radio to a slow station, setting the volume low so it wouldn't keep Brooke awake or disturb her sleep. "Get some rest, honey," Karen rubbed her back one last time before she quietly left the room. Brooke closed her eyes as she laid her head on the pillow and listened to the smooth tone of a country song that had just started playing on the radio. Then the words hit her ears and she began to cry again as the events of the past week resurfaced in her mind.

_What do you do, where do you go__  
__When nowhere feels like home..._

_Oh, to hold somebody close that cares_  
_Oh, to finally find some roots somewhere_  
_I know someday I'll find that it's out there..._

It wasn't long after Karen left Lucas' bedroom that she heard the phone ring. She rushed to get it and picked it up on the second ring, "Hello, Roe residence. This is Karen." "Karen, is-is Lucas around? I tried to get a hold of him on his cell phone but he won't answer it," Nathan sounded worried over the line. "She's here, Nathan," Karen responded. He let out a sigh of relief, "She is? Thank god! I'll be over in a few minutes-" "No, don't come here, Nathan," Karen ordered, "She's pretty upset and I just got her to lay down and rest for awhile; she's exhausted. Give her some time." "But I need-" Nathan began to protest, but Karen interrupted him. "I know you want to see her but she's not ready to see or talk to you yet. I'll tell you what, let Brooke sleep for two hours and then you can come over. Two hours and nothing less, Nathan," Karen warned. "Okay, thank you Karen," Nathan responded with a smile, "I'll see you in two hours." "Don't thank me yet," Karen muttered under her breath then said louder, "Bye Nathan."

The two hours of waiting and pacing, pacing and waiting, were long and agonizing for Nathan and the minute they were up, he was standing at Karen's front door. Karen glared at him as she answered the door, "You couldn't wait a few more minutes?" "I can't wait any longer. I need to see her. Is she up yet," Nathan asked anxiously. "No, she's still sleeping. First, we need to talk," Karen gestured him into the house then closed the door, crossing her arms over her chest. "What about," Nathan asked, inwardly cringing because he had a feeling this conversation wasn't going to go well. "She was really upset when she came over here, Nathan. She was crying and she felt sick… she was a complete mess. She can't have any stress in her condition, Nathan. Now, I-" Nathan looked up at her, "She told you?" Karen nodded her head in affirmation, "You have to be really careful with her, Nathan. Stress isn't good for her or the baby. If her stress levels or blood pressure get too high, something bad could happen. She could lose the baby or go into premature labor. Her age and small frame don't help matters either."

Nathan turned pale and he had a panic-stricken expression on his face, "How do you know all this?" "Because when I was pregnant with Lucas, the doctor told me the same things I'm telling you. Brooke and I are about the same height and she's about the same age I was… and because I almost lost Lucas once…when I was five months along. I went into premature labor. Luckily, they were able to stop the contractions and I had Lucas at about eight months." "Oh…" Nathan responded quietly, swallowing hard as he tried to digest all of what Karen had said to him. "Don't upset her, Nathan," Karen warned, "She's been through a lot today." Nathan nodded silently and Karen gestured towards the hallway, telling him it was okay to go see her.

Nathan quietly entered Lucas' room and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed beside Brooke's sleeping form. His eyes traveled over her body for a few moments, seeing her tear-stained cheeks and one of her hands was splayed protectively against her stomach. He choked up as he remembered what Karen had said to him. He would never forgive himself if anything happened to Brooke or the baby. Nathan gently placed his hand on her shoulder and a couple minutes later, she began to stir awake. Brooke turned her head slightly and her eyes slowly fluttered open, but when she saw him sitting next to her, she closed them again. "What are you doing here," she whispered hoarsely. Nathan's hand traveled down her arm and took her hand into his own as tears formed in his eyes and his voice choked up, "Brooke, I-I am so, so sorry I yelled at you this morning… I didn't mean to, I swear. It's just- when I saw you two holding hands, I-I thought you were getting back together with him and I was scared because…because you two would be together and it seemed like…like I wouldn't matter anymore and Lucas would be raising the baby with you, instead of me."

Nathan closed his eyes and a few tears slipped through as he hung his head, trying to hide his face from her view. Brooke sat up and gripped his hand tighter, lifting his chin with an index finger, "I would never deny you your child, Nathan. I wasn't getting back together with Lucas. He wanted to, but I told him no. You have to understand, Nathan, Lucas was my first true love and a part of me will always love him. He was the only guy who truly loved me for me but he broke my heart. I've always had trust issues, but when I found out about Peyton and Lucas… all of my trust, everything I knew, went out the window. It's going to take some time to rebuild my trust. Maybe one day I will be able to open my heart up again, but I don't see it happening in the near future." Nathan's eyes widened in surprise, "You want to date other people?" "In the future, after the baby is born. Maybe, I don't know," Brooke replied uncertainly, glancing up at him from the corner of her eye, "Don't you?" No, Nathan said to himself in his head, but responded cautiously, not wanting to upset her, "Um, I think it would be best, for the sake of the baby, if we didn't see other people. I mean, the baby might get confused, you know, seeing its parents dating other people and not each other. You know what I mean?" Brooke nodded silently as she looked down, now only realizing that their hands were still locked together.

"It's best for the baby," Brooke nodded again a few moments later, tears welling in her eyes as she looked down and placed a hand against her stomach. "I am so sorry I yelled at you…" Nathan brushed some hair away from her face and wiped away her tears with his thumb, "Please don't cry." "It's the hormones, I can't help it," Brooke let out a soft chuckle as she sniffled and rubbed her wet cheeks. Nathan's forehead wrinkled in concern. "I know I must have stressed you out a lot this morning with everything that happened. Are you and the baby okay," he asked worriedly as he brushed his fingertips briefly over her stomach. It was the first time he had touched her there since she had told him she was pregnant. His child was growing inside of her. It was a miraculous thing; a live little human being was in there. He was going to be a father in seven months.

"We're fine," Brooke gave him a small smile as she took his hand and pressed it against her flat abdomen, "a little tired but fine." "Why don't we go back to the apartment and you can go take another little nap if you're still tired. I got your room all ready," Nathan responded. Brooke's face brightened, "You did?" Nathan nodded, "Karen wouldn't let me come over here for two hours because she wanted you to rest so I unpacked everything and set it all up." "Thank you," Brooke replied as she sat up on her knees and hugged him tight. "No problem," he responded as he held out his hand and helped her up from the bed, "come on, let's go home." She gave him one of her dimpled smiles and he grinned back as he wrapped an arm around her waist and guided her towards the door.

Once they arrived back at the apartment, Brooke went to lie down for a little while after she had eaten some of her food from Taco Bell that had been left untouched from the night before. Nathan decided to go pick up the mail and as he walked to the mailboxes, he couldn't stop smiling over the talk they'd had at Karen's. He got to touch his child for the first time and Brooke had agreed that she wouldn't date any other guys; he had her all to himself. He knew it was selfish, but he loved her and he really did believe that it would be confusing for their child if he or she saw their parents dating other people, not that he would want to date other people anyway. All he needed was Brooke, and their baby, and that would be enough for him. He knew that Brooke didn't have feelings for him, but maybe over time, she would love him. Nathan's smile broadened as he opened the mail box with his key. Who knows, maybe she would fall in love with him and they would get married someday then all three of them could be one happy little family; Nathan, Brooke, and their baby. Nathan's brows furrowed in confusion as he sifted through the mail in his hands, noticing a postcard from California among the bills and junk mail. He turned it over and his eyes widened in realization. Oh shit, Haley.


	4. Life Changes In An Instant

**Author's Note: **Hey guys! I know I said it would only be two weeks until the next update, but life got in the way. My finals weren't over until the 18th and since then I've been working like 9 hour days at my job and I don't get home until late and I'm just so worn out that I fall into bed. I also sometimes get "mushy brain" around the holidays, my brain is like…blah. It's hard to think of ideas and what to write due to lack of inspiration. Anyway, I thought I'd give you your Christmas present a day early. A new chapter! No matter what holiday you're celebrating this time of year, I hope you all have a good one! I hope you like the new chapter! As always, please read and review!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. One Tree Hill and its characters are property of the CW.

**Rating: **K+ to T

**Chapter 4 – Life Changes In an Instant **

Somehow, through all the hubbub and the drama of finding out about the baby and working things out with Brooke, Nathan had forgotten one very major thing that put a huge dent in his dreams of Brooke and him being together, even as friends living together. He was still married. He berated himself in his head for being so stupid. How could he not remember? He was still wearing his wedding ring for Christ sakes. He wondered if Brooke had noticed what he had been blind to see. He went to take the wedding ring off, but he hesitated for a moment, thinking. He thought back to the day he had given her the ultimatum. Never in his wildest dreams had he thought she would choose the tour and Chris Keller over him. He had always wondered what had gone wrong between them. Their love wasn't strong enough to keep her here with him; he loved her more than she loved him. They were too young and blind to the realities of the world; they were just two kids who thought they were madly in love and that their love would be enough. He could go on and on with reasons. Many people had said it wouldn't work between them and Nathan had been foolish enough to deny it.

Haley had been gone for about six months now. Nothing had been spoken between the two of them since he had issued the ultimatum, except for a message from Haley on the answering machine pleading for him to understand that this opportunity was one she couldn't pass up, it had always been a dream of hers to sing and perform, and now the postcard from California he had just received. Nathan flipped it over to read what it said. There wasn't much, just a few short sentences scribbled in her handwriting. It looked like she had been writing in a hurry with the way her words tilted a little more to the right than they usually did when she took her time to write something. It read:

_Dear Nathan, _

_I'm in California now, as you can probably tell by the picture on the front. I hope you are doing okay back there in Tree Hill. Life has been so busy lately that I hardly have time to do anything but sleep between song rehearsals, performances, and radio spots. The tour is amazing. It is nothing and everything like I imagined; it is so much better! I really love it. I wish you were here so you could experience it with me. I miss you. _

_Love, _

_Haley _

Nathan crumpled up the postcard angrily. "Back there in Tree Hill," he muttered in disgust. She sounded so…snooty when she wrote that line, like she was above him somehow for finally achieving her dreams and leaving Tree Hill behind. Popularity and fame had changed her; she wasn't the girl he had married anymore. He knew she probably didn't mean it that way, but that is how he felt. He was bitter about the whole thing; that was for sure. What guy wouldn't be if your wife left you for another man? Even if it hadn't been about Chris, which Haley claimed it wasn't, why hadn't she asked him to go with her? She had never answered that question the night he had given her the ultimatum.

He went back inside the apartment and sat down on one of the stools at the island counter. He sat there for a long time, thinking, thinking about everything; Haley, their marriage, the memories, Brooke, the baby, everything. After two hours, Nathan sat back and looked down at his left hand, slowly twisting his wedding ring around his finger. A few moments passed and Nathan slowly pulled it off. He stood and walked down the hallway to his bedroom and closed the door behind him. Nathan walked over to his nightstand and opened the bottom drawer. He took the crumpled up postcard and smoothed it out, placing it inside the drawer, then set his wedding ring on top of it, staring at it a few moments before he finally closed the drawer.

He let out a large sigh and rubbed his face as he sat down on the edge of the bed and took his shoes off then laid back against his pillows, staring up at the ceiling for a few minutes before he finally closed his eyes. It seemed that as soon as Nathan had fallen asleep, he woke to a soft knock on his bedroom door. "Come in," he called out. Brooke opened the door a bit and stood there a few seconds before she ventured closer, "I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" "It's alright. What's up," he asked, moving to a sitting position. "Well, um, I'm getting kind of hungry and um…" "I could fix you something…" Nathan began but stopped as realization hit him, "right, there's nothing in the fridge. Grocery shopping it is."

"Okay, what kind of cereal do you want," Nathan asked as they turned down the breakfast aisle. Brooke smiled as she grabbed a box of Fruit Loops and Lucky Charms and showed them to him. Nathan raised an eyebrow and smirked, "Lucky Charms and Fruit Loops, Brooke?" "What? It's good stuff," she replied indignantly. "Yeah, if you're five," he laughed. "Hey, I'm allowed to have a little guilty pleasure once in a while," she responded. Nathan's eyes clouded over for a moment as he thought of something and he responded firmly, "You have to eat healthy, Brooke. Here, what about this?" Now it was Brooke's turn to raise her eyebrow, "Cheerios? Aren't they a little bland?" "They're healthy and…" Nathan paused for a moment, "babies like them." "Fine, whatever. Put them in the damn cart," Brooke grumbled and crossed her arms over her chest as a pout formed on her face, turning away from him. Oh no, she's in one of her moods again, Nathan thought as he groaned to himself. He picked up the boxes of Fruit Loops and Lucky Charms and went to stand in front of her, "Okay, you can have one sugary cereal. Which one do you want?" Brooke's face brightened and a smile appeared back on her face as she took the box of Fruit Loops from him and placed them in the cart. "Good choice, my favorite," Nathan smiled.

They were silent for a few minutes as they strolled along the different aisles. "The baby can't eat Cheerios right now, you know Nathan, it's not even born yet," Brooke said. "Sure it can. Whatever you eat gets transferred to the baby, that's why the doctors say pregnant women have to eat healthy. All the nutrients and stuff go to the baby to help it grow," Nathan responded. Brooke tilted her head to the side in confusion as she looked up at him, "Where did you learn that?" "Read it in a magazine while I was in the waiting room when we went to get your pregnancy confirmed," Nathan responded with a shrug. She gave him one of her dimpled smiles in return.

The two hit the produce section for some fresh fruits and vegetables before they split up so Brooke could go get some makeup stuff. It was now twenty minutes later and Nathan had yet to see Brooke. He had been almost all over the whole store looking for her but there was no sign of her. He did finally find her though, staring and softly fingering a pair of small pink socks in the baby section. "Did I tell you it's going to be a boy," Nathan grinned as he approached her. "What makes you say that? You're not psychic," Brooke chuckled. "I just have a feeling," Nathan winked at her, "plus, another thing I learned from the magazine is that the father determines the sex of the baby, not the mother. I come from a long line of boys in the family." "We'll see. I think it's going to be a girl," Brooke smiled. "I bet you fifty bucks it's a boy," Nathan responded confidently. Brooke slapped his arm and stared at him, a shocked expression on her face, "Nathan, I will not bet on the sex of our child!" "Well, if you're so confident that it's a girl then why not? Chicken," he chuckled. Brooke hit his arm again, "Make it a hundred and it's a deal." Nathan nodded his head and grinned, "You're on."

He reached over and grabbed a pair of blue socks, placing them in the cart, "I'm buying these for our son." "We're having a girl," Brooke said, setting the pink socks in the cart then took the blue ones and put them back on the rack, "Girls don't wear blue. They wear pinks and purples, girly colors." "Girls can wear blue," Nathan protested, "You wear blue." "But not as babies! Girls wear pink and boys wear blue, it's always been that way." "Typical gender stereotyping," Nathan muttered then said louder, "How about we just get some socks that are a neutral color like yellow or green, or white?" "Fine," Brooke grumbled, a disgruntled pout forming on her face as she put the pink socks back and grabbed some yellow ones. He leaned his head towards her and gave her a small smile, "You know, if we argue this much over a pair of baby socks, what's it going to be like when we have to pick out clothes for the baby?" "We'll just wait to get them after the baby is born. Then we can pick out pink clothes for our daughter," Brooke responded. "Then what will the baby wear home from the hospital? And it will be blue clothes for our son," Nathan smiled, but it faded when he saw something, or rather someone, standing at the end of the aisle.

Almost as soon as Nathan saw him, he disappeared. "Oh god, Lucas knows," Nathan said as he turned back around to face Brooke. At the sight of Lucas, Brooke had turned pale, fearing Lucas would say something or try to hurt Nathan for she knew he was probably still upset about the news. "Brooke, are you alright," Nathan asked concernedly as he placed a hand on her shoulder. "Y-Yeah, I'm fine," Brooke sighed as she ran a hand through her hair, "Nathan, Luke already knows about the baby." His brows wrinkled in confusion, "What? How?" "When I was at Karen's, resting in Lucas' room, I was crying about what had happened this morning and I said some things about you and the baby, but I didn't mention your name, and I guess Lucas heard me and he thought the baby was his. I told him it wasn't and when he found out it was you who was the father, we got into this big fight…" Brooke began to get teary and Nathan wrapped his arms around her, rubbing her back up and down in soothing strokes as she buried her face in his chest, "Sh… it's alright. I think we're pretty much done here. Let's check out and go home." Brooke nodded against him and they headed towards the cashiers, Nathan's arm never leaving her side.

When they arrived back at the apartment, they put the groceries away and afterwards, Brooke took the pair of baby socks and went to her room. She sat down on her bed and stared at them a few long minutes, slowly rubbing her fingers over the soft material. It was the first thing they had bought for their child. Sometimes it seemed so unreal, fake, that she was pregnant; she couldn't believe it. Having something tangible, something she could touch, made the presence of a baby more real to her. She knew though that the baby would never be more real to her than when her child started to move around inside of her. She couldn't wait to feel the baby kick and greatly anticipated the day when she felt her baby's first movements. Brooke smiled as she stood from the bed and walked over to the bulletin board hanging on the wall near her nightstand then took a push pin and stuck it into the board, hanging the baby socks on it. She smiled as she stared at them and gently rested a hand against her stomach.

A few moments later, Brooke turned around and nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw Nathan standing in the doorway. She placed a hand to her chest, "God Nathan, you scared me." "Sorry," he grinned sheepishly, "Uh, dinner's ready." "Okay thanks. I'll be there in a minute," Brooke replied, grabbing a washcloth and heading towards the bathroom. "Mmm, this all smells great. What is it," Brooke asked when she entered the kitchen. "I made salad, grilled chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans," Nathan responded as he set their plates down on the table. "Thanks, it looks wonderful," Brooke smiled at him before she took a bite of it, "Yumm." "Glad you like it," Nathan said in return. After a few minutes of silence as they each ate their food, Nathan asked, "Hey Brooke?" "Yeah," she inquired, looking up at him. "Do you think Lucas will tell people about the baby?" A frown formed on her face as she set her fork down, "I don't know. I hope not. I honestly didn't really think about it until now. I mean, if he tells people then we'll deal with it. If not, then we'll keep it secret until I start to show." Nathan nodded his head and went back to eating his food.

The next morning, the two arrived at school early for once. As they walked towards their lockers, Nathan noticed that Brooke had her arms wrapped around her stomach and she looked a little pale. "Still feeling sick," he asked quietly. Brooke nodded. She had already had two rounds of morning sickness that day and couldn't keep anything down. Nathan pulled his backpack from his shoulders and dug through it for a moment then handed her a bag of crackers, "Here, these are supposed to help with the nausea." She smiled up at him gratefully as she took them from him, "Thanks." The minute warning bell sounded and Nathan said to her, "I hope you feel better. I'll see you at lunch, okay?" Brooke nodded in response before they parted ways and each went to their first class.

"Hey Brooke," Nathan called out when he spotted her leaving her last class of the day, speeding up his pace to catch up to her. She stopped and turned around, "Yeah?" He finally caught up to her and whispered in her ear, "How are you feeling?" "I'm okay now. It was just the morning sickness kicking in earlier. The crackers helped," she responded with a smile. "I'm glad," he replied then said, "Listen, Whitey called a practice this afternoon so I can't take you home right away. Would you mind waiting for me until practice is over?" "Oh no, that's fine. I have cheer practice anyway so we'll probably be done at the same time as you guys," Brooke responded with a wave of her hand in dismissal. "Brooke…" Nathan's brows furrowed in concern. "I'll be fine. Don't worry," she said, knowing what he was thinking about. He continued to stare at her warily for a few moments before he finally nodded.

"Brooke! Where have you been? We haven't seen you in like a week," Bevin squealed and hugged her when she entered the locker room. "I've been sick. I haven't really been feeling all that well. I'm feeling a little better today so I thought I should come to practice. I am captain after all. Plus, we need to prepare for the upcoming Sparkle Classic. I want to beat Claire Young this year," Brooke explained. She knew she wouldn't be able to participate in the Classic this year because she would be too far along in her pregnancy, but she was captain and she was determined to have her squad win because this was the last year she would be eligible since she was a senior. "Alright girls, let's get changed and start practice. We have a lot to work on," Brooke shouted over the voices as she clapped her hands. Once they were dressed, they headed out to the gym where basketball practice was already under way. Nathan, who was in line for shooting free throws, saw Brooke as she passed him and gave her a small smile. She smiled back at him. Brooke walked over to where the girls were and sat down on the floor, beginning to stretch. "Okay," Brooke tried to get their attention after they had stretched and limbered up for about ten minutes, "first we're going to start off with our regular Ravens cheer to warm up then we'll continue working on the cheer we were practicing last week, alright? Let's go, get into positions."

Peyton nervously bit her lip as she approached Brooke cautiously. She knew Brooke was still mad at her for what had happened between her and Lucas, but she still held out hope that one day Brooke would forgive her and they could be friends again. She knew they would never be the same again, as close as they once were, but she'd give anything to have her best friend back. "Brooke," she inquired quietly. Even though she had her back turned, Brooke immediately recognized the voice and spun on her heel to face the blonde backstabbing ex-best friend. "What," she shouted angrily. Peyton flinched at the harshness of her tone. "Well, um, while you were gone… we, um, thought of some new moves for the cheer and it's, um, a little different than what you had originally showed us, but…well, anyway, we wanted to show it to you," Peyton bit her lip again, waiting for her response. Brooke clenched her jaw as she turned from Peyton and waved her hand for them to go on.

Once they performed the new cheer, Peyton and the rest of the squad waited on baited breath for Brooke's reaction as their captain paced back and forth in front of them. Brooke was silent for a few minutes before she shouted at them, "That was nothing like the cheer I made up! You changed everything around!" "Brooke, we were just experimenting…We thought it would be better if we could incorporate the new moves into the cheer for the Classic-" Peyton was cut off by Brooke's booming voice, seething with rage, "You don't understand! This is my squad, I am captain! I make the cheers! Everybody, Ravens cheer, NOW!" "You're not the only one who has ideas for new cheers, Brooke! Don't take this out on them! It was my idea to change the cheer you made up," Peyton said as she stepped up to her. "Oh, it was you who wanted to change it? Why doesn't that surprise me? Every time I turn around you're stabbing me in the back!" Brooke yelled at her. "It was a mistake! We have been friends for nine, almost ten, years, Brooke! How many times do I have to say I'm sorry before you'll forgive me," Peyton yelled back at her, tears now welling in her eyes.

Brooke noticed one of the cheerleaders performing a move that was less than perfect. They needed to be in top condition for the Classic and if that move had been performed there under the judges' scrutiny, points would have been taken off for it. "Courtney," Brooke shouted as she ran over to her, "you didn't do that back flip twist right. We need it to be perfect for the Classic. Let me show you how it's done." Brooke jogged to one end of the gym and stretched for a few seconds before she started to perform the move. Brooke advanced closer and closer towards the squad doing a series of back flips and just as she began to twist her body so that she would end up landing facing the group of cheerleaders, Brooke felt a searing pain course through her abdomen. Screaming out in agony and fear, she wrapped an arm around her stomach as she lost her momentum and fell onto the gym floor, landing on her left shoulder. "Oh my god, Brooke," Peyton screamed as she raced over to her.

From across the gym where basketball practice was being held, everything stopped when they heard the scream. Nathan whipped his head around and his eyes widened in fear, dropping the ball he had in his hands as he ran as fast as he could, "Brooke!" Lucas was right behind him. Even though they were broken up, he still cared about her. Plus, even though he was still upset about it, she was carrying his niece or nephew and he wanted to make sure they were both alright. "Oh god, Brooke," Nathan sank to his knees when he reached her, tears falling from his eyes. "Brooke-" Peyton started to say something but Nathan looked up at her angrily. "Get away from her! Haven't you already done enough?" "Nathan…" Brooke said weakly, her voice almost drowned out by her sobs, "it hurts so much…" She was gripping her shoulder now, but he saw the fear in her eyes. He knew it was the baby. She was just probably trying to hide the fact that she was pregnant from the concerned cheerleaders and basketball players trying to crowd around her. Lucas saw that nobody was doing anything, just standing around looking at Brooke. "Somebody call an ambulance," he shouted.


	5. Aftermath

**Author's Note: **Wow! I know it's been a REALLY long time, like forever, since I last updated this story. I would have updated earlier, but circumstances beyond my control occurred and I couldn't update until now. First of all, I had a really heavy course load this semester and really had to focus on my studies. Plus I had some night classes, which took up the evenings when I usually wrote. Second, back in February, my house was broken into while all of us (four adults) and three dogs (they are little mind you but two of them could pack a good bite) were asleep in our bedrooms. A lot of our expensive, valuable stuff was stolen like my laptop, my iPod, my purse & wallet, my dad's wallet and other stuff as well including my little USB flash drive that I keep my stories on (but I kept back ups on my laptop) so since BOTH my laptop and USB drive were stolen, all of my stories were gone, and I mean GONE. I literally had to start over. I had all my finished stories on the USB plus all my current stories (ITPOAA and this story) plus all the ones I had been working on but not formally posted. Luckily I had my two current stories and my finished stories posted online so I got those back. The other stories however, the only stuff I could salvage from those was what I still remembered in my head. I just don't remember the little details about the stories that made them so great. Anyway, because of the "home invasion" as the police called it, and my stuff getting stolen, I have severe lack of motivation and inspiration to continue writing. But I forged on and finally finished this chapter. For those of you who read ITPOAA, I am still working on the new chapter. It is very hard doing a chapter on the aftermath of a big event in the story. Anyway, I'll stop ranting and babbling and let you read the chapter now. Hope you like it! As always, please read and review! Thanks!

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. One Tree Hill and its characters are property of the CW.

**Rating: **K+ to T

**There Goes My Life**

**Chapter 5 - Aftermath **

It seemed like forever waiting for the ambulance to come. Although the hospital was nearby the school, it had been almost fifteen minutes before it finally arrived. The paramedics quickly and carefully placed Brooke on a gurney and strapped her in so she wouldn't further injure her shoulder. As they loaded her into the back of the ambulance, Nathan jumped in and sat down, gently taking Brooke's hand into his and slowly rubbing his thumb over it. He desperately wanted to hold her and comfort her, but he was afraid he'd hurt her shoulder even more, so he'd have to be content holding her hand. Nathan was too concentrated on Brooke to hear or notice Lucas declare that he was coming with and hop into the rig beside him. Once they were on their way, Brooke moved her good arm and softly placed her hand on her stomach as she choked on a sob, turning to the paramedic sitting on the other side of the ambulance, "I'm two and a half, almost three months pregnant. I'm not having a miscarriage, am I?" "I'm not sure. We'll know more once we get you to the hospital," the paramedic, whose name tag read David across it, replied as he turned in his seat and grabbed what looked like a long belt with some kind of box-shaped machine attached to it. "What is that," Nathan asked, his forehead wrinkled in confusion. "This is a portable fetal monitor. It measures the baby's heartbeat and tells us if and when your baby is in distress or not," David answered then said to Brooke, "I need you to lift your shirt up a little so I can put this on."

Once she did so, David pressed his stethoscope to her stomach, trying to find the baby's heartbeat. Brooke and Nathan gripped each other's hand tighter as several minutes passed and still the paramedic had not found anything. Finally, to everyone's relief, David pinpointed a spot and placed his finger there while he fastened the fetal monitor in place over it. He listened for a few seconds and a frown formed on his face, "It appears that the baby is in some distress. The heartbeat is faster than it should be." "Something's wrong with the baby? Oh god," Nathan choked up, tears filling his eyes. Brooke turned to him, a sob escaping her throat as she grasped his hand even tighter, "I-I don't want to lose our baby, Nathan." He leaned forward and brought his face close to hers so she could focus only on him, "We are not going to lose this baby, Brooke. I promise you. Our baby is a fighter. He didn't get both our stubborn natures for nothing." "She," Brooke corrected him with a small smile of her own. Nathan chuckled and squeezed her hand gently, "Everything will be fine."

It was only a few minutes later when the paramedic checked the fetal monitor again and his frown deepened as he recorded the results on his clipboard, "The heart rate is dropping." "That's good, isn't it," Nathan asked, confused at David's facial expression, "You said the baby's heart rate was faster than normal earlier. If the heart rate is slowing down, does that mean the baby is still in distress?" "Unfortunately, no, it isn't good. Your baby's heart rate has dropped to just below the normal level-" David stopped abruptly at the sound of a loud, frantic beeping. "What's that," Nathan asked quickly, fear filling every part of his body. David pounded on the window separating the back of the ambulance from the cab, shouting, "Fetal heart rate is crashing!" "Oh my god," Brooke cried as she buried her face in Nathan's arm. "How much longer until we get to the hospital," Lucas finally spoke up, glancing worriedly between Brooke and Nathan. David banged on the window again, "Hey Joe! What's the ETA?" "About five more minutes," he hollered back. "This is ridiculous," Lucas shouted, "Is there any way we can go faster? We need to get her to the hospital where there are doctors who competent and able to treat her! You guys aren't doing anything to help her or her baby!" "I'm sorry, there's nothing we can do. We can't give her anything because it might affect the fetus. We'll be there in just a few minutes, sir, just calm down." Lucas boiled with rage, "CALM DOWN! You want me to calm down? A few minutes can mean life or death!" Almost as soon as he finished his sentence, a loud and incessant beep pierced the air. David looked at all the monitors Brooke was hooked up to then looked at the three teenagers with a grave face, "We lost the baby's heartbeat."

Nathan paced back and forth around the waiting room for hours, waiting on news about Brooke and the baby. As soon as they had arrived at the hospital, a team of doctors and nurses had whisked Brooke away and he was left there worried and scared out of his mind. "Dude, stop pacing. You're making me dizzy," Lucas told his brother from where he sat, trying to stay calm for Nathan's sake as he tried to still his nervous legs. "I can't help it," Nathan sighed as he sat down beside Lucas and rubbed his face, "They've been in there forever. Why haven't they told us what's going on? I'm worried Luke. What if she loses the baby? Brooke will be so crushed…" Lucas placed a hand on his brother's shoulder, "That won't happen. Brooke is strong; she and the baby will pull through."

"Nathan Scott," a voice called out and Nathan turned to see a doctor with a clipboard enter the waiting room. The two brothers stood and approached the man. "I'm Nathan. How is Brooke? Is the baby alright," he asked anxiously. "The baby is doing just fine," the doctor smiled to ease the young man's worries, "the reason why the fetal monitor started beeping like that was because the baby moved and it lost the signal of the baby's heartbeat. I assure you the baby is healthy and active." Nathan nodded, too choked up for words, but finally found his voice, "And Brooke? How is she doing? I know she must have hurt her shoulder pretty bad." "Brooke sprained her shoulder and her arm. She mostly hurt the muscles and tendons in the shoulder and part of the neck. She doesn't appear to have chipped any bone. We didn't perform an x-ray because the radiation can cause a miscarriage in early pregnancy. Brooke will be in a sling for a couple of weeks, but everything indicates that she will make a full recovery," the doctor told them. Nathan finally smiled, relieved.

"Nathan if you will follow me, I'll show you where her room is. She's been asking for you. I also need to talk to both of you about a few things," the doctor added. A concerned expression appeared on Nathan's face. "Nothing to worry about, just some little stuff about her recovery when she goes home," the doctor chuckled as he patted the young man on the shoulder. "Okay," Nathan responded then turned to his brother with tears in his eyes. "I told you Brooke and the baby would be okay," Lucas smiled. He nodded as he wrapped Lucas in a strong embrace. Lucas patted his back for a minute before he pulled away, "Go see Brooke. Tell her I'm glad she and the baby are alright." "I will," Nathan responded then asked as Lucas turned away, "You aren't going to stay?" "Nah, you and Brooke need to be together right now. I'll visit her later." "Thanks," Nathan smiled and called out a few seconds later, "Hey Luke? Could you do me a favor?" "What," he asked. "Could you go back to the school and bring my car over here? I don't want to leave Brooke and I'll need it if they release her tonight," Nathan said. "Sure," Lucas replied and Nathan tossed him his keys. "Thanks again," Nathan replied. "No problem," Lucas responded as he waved goodbye and headed towards the hospital doors. Nathan finally turned and followed the doctor down the hall.

Just as they reached Brooke's room, the doctor dug into his pocket and pulled out his pager. He looked at it for a moment then turned to Nathan, "I'm sorry, I have to go check on a patient. I will be back as soon as I can to talk with you and Brooke. You can go in and see her." "Thank you," Nathan nodded as the doctor hurried off down the hall. Nathan stood outside her door for a few minutes, trying to collect his thoughts and emotions. Finally, he slowly pushed the door open and entered the room. He found her sitting up, slightly reclined back in her bed, sobbing uncontrollably as she stared down at her stomach, slowly rubbing circles across it over and over again. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm so sorry," she cried. "Brooke," he called out softly, trying to get her attention. Brooke raised her head and looked up at him with tears brimming in her eyes, finding his eyes full too. "I'm sorry," Brooke shut her eyes tight and bent her head as she choked on a sob. "Sh…" he rushed to her side and cupped her cheek in his hand, wiping her tears away, "As long as you and the baby are alright, nothing else matters." Brooke nodded as she looked down at her stomach and placed her hand on it.

"Does your stomach still hurt," he asked concernedly. "Yeah, it's a little achy, but it's a lot better than before. God, it hurt so bad… I was so scared we were going to lose the baby…" she leaned over and buried her face in his chest. He rubbed her back for a few moments and when she pulled away, he asked softly, trying to control his anger for Brooke's sake, "What were you thinking when you pulled that stunt back in the gym today? You're pregnant, Brooke. You can't do things like that anymore." "I know, I'm sorry," fresh tears fell down her cheeks, "I was just- I was so mad at Peyton for changing my routine and everything else and I-I wanted the routine to be perfect for the Sparkle Classic coming up because it's my last year here and then Courtney was doing one of the maneuvers wrong… In all my years as captain of the Ravens cheerleaders, we have never won the Sparkle Classic. I know I won't be able to participate in the Classic this year because I'll be too far along by then, but for once I wanted to win, not only for me but for the girls too. They've all worked so hard for it."

"I don't want you to do any more cheerleading, Brooke. You could get hurt, even worse than what happened today. I don't want you to lose the baby," Nathan gently placed his hand on her stomach, careful not to hurt her. Brooke fought back more tears, once again reminded that Nathan only cared about her because of the baby she was carrying. The past couple of weeks he had been caring and concerned about her, and sometimes his worrying was a tad bit overbearing. He had good reason, of course, but his protectiveness was starting to pinch a nerve. Yet despite all this, she wondered if Nathan did have feelings for her. It was in his kindness, the way he comforted her when she was upset, his little subtle touches like when he would wipe away her tears with his thumb, kiss her forehead, or gently brush his fingers over her stomach, that made her suspect there might be something more to their relationship. Every time he touched her, the butterflies would do somersaults inside her.

"W-What? I can't quit cheerleading. I'm captain and it's my last year here. This is my last chance at the Sparkle Classic-" Brooke said, but Nathan cut her off. "Dammit Brooke! I don't want you cheerleading anymore! I don't care if you stand on the sidelines and coach, I just don't want you doing any more stunts. You're endangering our baby when you do them-" This time it was Brooke who interrupted him, "Endangering our baby? Nathan, I have been cheerleading for as long as I can remember, since I was a little girl. I am skilled at what I do; I know how to perform the maneuvers-" "You did today. You took our baby's life in your hands when you performed that maneuver. We almost lost the baby because of that stunt you pulled today," Nathan said angrily then crossed his arms and turned away, staring out the window. Brooke lowered her head and choked on a sob. "I-I can't handle this right now. I need to get out of here," Nathan said a few minutes later as he headed towards the door. "Nathan…" Brooke called out softly. Nathan paused for a moment, his hand on the door knob, then silently left the room without once looking back.

Hours later, Nathan returned to Brooke's hospital room. She lay there with the head of her bed reclined slightly backwards. She didn't move or even look at him as he approached her. It seemed as if she didn't notice he was there at all. Tears leaked from her eyes and every once in a while, her body would go into tiny little convulsions from trying to hold them back. His eyes drifted down and he found both her hands resting on her bare stomach, her shirt pushed up by a fetal monitor. Nathan stopped; that hadn't been there before, only when she was in the ambulance. Had something happened while he was gone? Worry began to course through his body. He closed the rest of the distance to her bed quickly. He carefully sat on the edge of her bed and placed his hand beside Brooke's, concern etched in his facial expression, "Brooke? What happened? Why are you wearing the fetal monitor? Did the baby's heart rate drop again?" Brooke did not answer him, didn't even move a muscle. "Brooke, tell me what's going on," Nathan demanded gently.

Brooke finally found her voice, but she couldn't bring herself to look at him. Her voice was hoarse and scratchy as she responded, pushing his hand away from her stomach, "Why should I tell you when you'll just remind me how much of a bad mother I am?" What he had said to her earlier had really hit home, hurting her to her very core and playing on one of her greatest fears. Brooke didn't really have the greatest examples to go by. Her parents were hardly ever around and when they did occasionally come around, they only criticized and yelled at her. The next morning they'd be gone and a check left on the kitchen table, their own way of attempting to smooth things over with their daughter. Brooke had promised herself that she would never be like her parents. She had to admit that the thought of becoming a mother scared her. She'd never been around babies before, except for the few times she'd seen Jake with his daughter, Jenny. She was afraid she'd do something wrong or wouldn't know what to do if something happened like not holding the baby the right way or if the baby got colic. But Brooke had promised herself that she would do whatever it took to be a good mother. She would read the books, go to the parenting classes, maybe even offer to do some babysitting for Jake to get some experience with babies. With millions of things running through her mind of what she needed to do to prepare for her baby, one thing was for certain. She would be there for her child and love her child with everything that she was, with everything she had.

"Brooke, I didn't tell you that you're a bad mother-" Nathan said, but Brooke cut him off. "You didn't have to say it," she whispered angrily, trying not to let her stress levels get high again, "You implied it by what you said earlier; that I was endangering our baby and that I almost lost the baby because of what I did. You see? I am a bad mother. I don't deserve this baby, but I want it. I want it so bad…" Brooke started to cry as she wrapped her arms around her stomach. Nathan took her hand into his own and softly rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand, "Brooke, you are going to be a great mother. You want this baby and I know you want to be the best mother you can for this baby. Being willing to try is half the battle. I haven't had the best examples for parents either. I have a lot of the same fears you do, Brooke. I want to be a good father. Sure, we'll both make mistakes from time to time, but we'll learn from that. Sometimes you just have to trust your instincts and do what feels right, that's why they call them 'maternal instincts'." "W-What if I don't have any," Brooke's lower lip trembled, "I've never really been around babies." "Of course you have them," Nathan responded, "every woman does. Besides, you've already shown some of your maternal instincts. You take vitamins to help the baby grow, you picked out socks for the baby when we went to the store, and earlier today when you were falling in the gym, you put your arm around your stomach to protect the baby from the fall. See? You do have maternal instincts and they'll only grow stronger as time passes. You're still trying to adjust to being pregnant and I understand that, but you have to be careful. Little to no stress, no excessive strain; I don't want you or the baby to get hurt, you're both too important to me." Nathan gently brushed a strand of hair behind her ear as Brooke lowered her head and choked on a few tears then buried her face in his chest, wrapping her good arm around his waist.

Later that afternoon, Brooke was resting in bed and Nathan was reading a sports magazine in one of the chairs nearby when a doctor entered the room, clipboard in hand. "Hello, I'm Dr.-" the woman stopped abruptly when she saw that Brooke's eyes were closed and lowered her voice to a whisper, "Oh, I'm sorry. I'll just come back later when she's awake." "I'm awake," Brooke answered groggily, "what's going on? Where's Dr. Jackson?" "First let me introduce myself. I'm Dr. Simon," she said as she stepped over to them and shook each of their hands, "it's nice to meet both of you. Dr. Jackson is releasing you this afternoon, but he first asked me to take one last look at the baby before we release you to make sure everything is okay." Brooke nodded then raised the bed up with the little controller on the side of the bed, "Nathan, can you help me sit up?" "Sure," he replied as he adjusted her pillows behind her back and placed one behind her shoulder to help support it. "I'm actually going to have you get out of bed so we can weigh you, if you feel up to it of course. Have you had your first prenatal visit yet," Dr. Simon asked. "I had my pregnancy confirmed at seven weeks. They did both a blood and urine test then once the doctor said I was definitely pregnant, she did an internal exam." "Okay, well today I'm just going to get your weight and check your blood pressure then lastly, we'll do an ultrasound, okay," Dr. Simon replied as she wrote some things down on her clipboard.

"We'll get to see the baby," Brooke questioned. "It can sometimes be hard to see the baby at such an early stage in pregnancy as you are, but given your situation with your baby experiencing a lot of distress, I'm going to do an ultrasound to make sure everything is okay as far as the placenta, the umbilical cord and everything," the older woman answered. "Okay," Brooke responded as she straightened up and scooted to the edge of the bed. Nathan rushed over and helped her down from the bed, "Careful. You were dizzy last time you got up." "Take as much time as you need, Brooke," the doctor said. "I'm fine," Brooke responded as she stood up and took a deep breath, "where do we need to go?" "Just over here to the scale so I can get your weight," Dr. Simon replied as she pointed to the large scale in the corner of the room. "Oh joy, we get to see how fat I am," Brooke rolled her eyes as she stepped onto it. "Brooke, you are not fat," Nathan admonished. "You're actually a bit underweight," Dr. Simon said as she moved the sliders on the scale, "You said you're about 10 weeks along, you should have gained two or three pounds by now and you need to gain five pounds by your twelfth week." "You've got to be kidding me," Brooke's eyes widened, "I've been eating like a horse and I still need to gain weight?" "I'm afraid so," Dr. Simon chuckled, "Of course the reality is that you'll put on more weight as your baby grows and you get bigger. Usually a woman will gain about twenty-five to thirty pounds during pregnancy, but that number can vary from woman to woman. However, your preliminary weight at your stage of pregnancy is a little bit lower than what it should be. In fact, it seems that your weight is less than what your doctor recorded at your first prenatal visit," the doctor said as she consulted her chart.

"I have had a little trouble with the nausea and morning sickness. Could it be all the throwing up that's making me lose weight," Brooke asked. "That could be part of it, but as a whole it shouldn't make you lose too much weight. For the morning sickness and nausea, I suggest eating some crackers and drinking 7UP. It works great on upset stomachs. Stress can be another factor too. Have you been experiencing a lot of stress lately," the doctor questioned. Brooke looked at Nathan for a moment then turned back to her, "It's been sort of a rollercoaster ride of emotions, feelings, and everything else since we found out about the pregnancy." "That's to be expected," Dr. Simon nodded, "Now Brooke, I'm going to have you get back in bed so I can take your blood pressure." Brooke did as told and Dr. Simon positioned the pressure cuff around her arm and started the pump, "Your blood pressure is slightly elevated, but still within the normal range. You really need to keep an eye on that. If your blood pressure or stress levels get too high, your baby can experience distress. Of course you can't get rid of stress completely, but try to avoid doing anything that will cause you stress. Now I'm going to do the ultrasound, okay?"

Brooke smiled as she looked at Nathan then turned back to the doctor, "I can't wait to finally see the baby." "I need you to lift up your shirt. I'm going to put some gel on your stomach, it's going to be a little cold," the doctor said as she pulled over the ultrasound machine. Brooke pulled up her shirt and flinched when the cold gel touched her abdomen. Dr. Simon began to move the transducer in circles while searching the screen on the ultrasound, "At your stage of pregnancy, the baby is still very small, only about two inches, so it may be hard to spot." She searched for a few more minutes before she finally found it, "Ah, here we go." "I want to see," Brooke said as she craned her neck to watch the screen. "Let me zoom in a second," Dr. Simon said before she started to point things out, "This is the head, here are the arms and here are the legs. It's still a bit early to tell whether the baby is a boy or a girl." "Oh," Brooke replied. "You want to know the sex of the baby," Nathan asked. "I don't know. I kind of want to be surprised, but we already know what the sex is going to be," Brooke smirked at him. "It's not going to be a girl," Nathan responded. "Would you like a picture," the doctor interjected. "Yes, can we have four copies please," Brooke inquired. "Certainly," the older woman smiled as she got up off her chair and pushed the machine back, "Okay, we're done with the ultrasound. You can wipe the gel off with this towel while I go get the pictures," Dr. Simon replied as she handed Brooke a small washcloth.

"Why do we need four copies," Nathan asked once the doctor had left the room. "Well, one each for you and me then I want to give one to Karen, and the last one I want to givetoLucas," Brooke mumbled as she lowered her head and stared at her hands then said quietly, "he is the baby's uncle." Brooke knew the subject of her ex-boyfriend might still be a sore subject, but Lucas was still a part of her life. She knew he still cared about her, even after the news about the baby. He had shown that when he had run over with Nathan when she had fallen and when he rode in the ambulance with them to the hospital. She hoped that Nathan and Lucas would make amends so Lucas could be a part of the baby's life. "That's a great idea," Nathan smiled. "What," Brooke asked confusedly, "you're not mad…about Lucas?" "Not really anymore. We've kind of sorted things out. I understand he still cares for you, but he cares about the baby too. He is the biological uncle and this baby will need lots of love to surround him or her, especially without grandparents. You said your dad would kick you out of the house once he found out. Dan will be furious. I say we leave our parents out of the picture." "The baby will have Karen. But you bring up another point. We need to tell our parents soon, even if we don't plan on including them in the baby's life. They should at least know they have a grandchild," Brooke responded. Nathan nodded in reply as Dr. Simon returned to the room.

"Okay Brooke, Nathan, I have baby's first picture here," the doctor smiled as she handed the copies to Brooke, "The ultrasound showed that the placenta is intact and no detachment has occurred so I will sign your discharge papers and you are good to go. Just remember to avoid any unnecessary stress or strain." "You mean I can leave," Brooke asked. "Unless you don't want to," the doctor chuckled. "No, by all means, sign the papers. I just thought that because of the baby and everything they might keep me overnight. But hey, if they're letting me go, I'm glad because I've never really liked hospitals all that much. I just want to go home," Brooke responded, laying her head back on her pillow. "Well, before you go, I'm also going to have you schedule an appointment to see me in six weeks for a checkup to make everything is coming along nicely. We'll take your blood pressure and measure your weight and do another ultrasound. We may be able to determine the sex of the baby next time, if the little one will let us look. Oh, and don't forget to put on some pounds; five by your twelfth week and ten by week sixteen when we meet again okay," Dr. Simon said as she tore off the discharge papers from her clipboard. Brooke groaned as she looked down and placed her good hand on her stomach, "Baby, what are you doing to me?" "You think that's bad? Just you wait. During your second and third trimesters, you'll need to gain one to two pounds every week," Dr. Simon winked at her and smiled. "Oh great," Brooke rolled her eyes and groaned again.

Once Brooke was released from the hospital, Nathan made her stay home for a couple days to recuperate before he finally allowed her to go back to school. Her first day back had been exhausting. It seemed like everyone in school had asked her how she was doing. It was sweet for a while, but then it just became annoying. She was now waiting outside the gym for Nathan. Classes had been let out for the day moments ago. She saw Nathan and Lucas walking towards her and smiled, "Hey." "Hey," Nathan replied then took Brooke's backpack off her shoulder, "Let me take your books. You shouldn't wear a backpack after you just hurt your shoulder." "It's fine, Nathan. I just have it on my good shoulder," Brooke responded exasperatedly as she handed it over and grinned, "but you can take them anyway." After a few minutes, Nathan looked at her concernedly, "Are you sure you want to do this? You don't have to do this, you know. You could always coach." Brooke sighed, "I know, but it would be too hard to coach. It's almost impossible to teach a routine without showing them the moves and if I can't do the moves, then what's the point of coaching? I just figure it would be best to cut the ties with cheerleading. That longing will always be there, but it will be easier not having to be around it. Plus, my stress levels won't skyrocket because I don't have to deal with Peyton anymore." Nathan nodded as the three of them entered the gym, "Okay, I'll see you at home after practice. Let me know how it goes." Brooke nodded in reply and watched as Nathan and Lucas jogged across the gym to the men's locker room to get ready for basketball practice. She then turned and looked at the group of cheerleaders on the other side of the gym and sighed as she prepared herself for what she was about to do before walking over.

Bevin was the first to spot her and quickly rushed over to her, "Brooke! Oh my god! How are you? How's your shoulder?" "I'm fine Bevin, thanks," Brooke patted her arm as they finally reached the group, "I hurt my shoulder pretty bad, but it's only a sprain. I sprained my arm too so I'll be in this sling for a few weeks." "But the Sparkle Classic is in six weeks," Courtney responded. "I know, that is what I came to talk to you about," Brooke replied, "You girls have worked very hard this year and you deserve a chance to win the Classic. Unfortunately, because of my arm, I won't be able to participate in it. Since this is my last year here and it is fast coming to a close, I have decided that the best thing to do is to resign and allow a new captain to lead you to the Classic. So I, Brooke Davis, hereby resign as captain of the Ravens cheerleading squad effective today." "Brooke, you don't have to resign. You can still take us to the Classic," Bevin shook her head, tears welling in her eyes.

"I'm afraid I can't, sweetie," Brooke told her as she wrapped an arm around her friend, "I'm just not able to perform the moves. I'll be in the stands cheering you on at the Classic, though. I wouldn't miss it for the world." "But you love cheerleading," Bevin protested, "there's got to be more to it than that. You wouldn't just quit for nothing. Is it because of Peyton?" "I am not quitting because of Peyton, but I did factor it into my decision. Don't get me wrong, Peyton is a great cheerleader, hardworking, and she'd make a great captain. I just can't be around her right now. If my stress levels get too high-" She abruptly stopped, realizing what she had let slip. Concerned, Bevin asked, "Stress levels? Are you sick?" Brooke felt like a deer caught in the headlights. She didn't know what to say to get out of this situation. "No, I'm not sick. It's just… I found out I have a condition that when my stress levels and blood pressure get high…" she looked around at all the concerned faces of her friends and sighed, "You're right, there is more to my decision, much more. The main reason I'm resigning from the squad is because I'm pregnant."

She paused for a for a moment, but everyone was too shocked and speechless to utter a word, so she continued on, "At practice last week…I shouldn't have done that maneuver, but I did and because of that, I put my baby in danger. I could have lost my baby because of what I did, but thankfully I didn't. I don't want anything like that to happen again so I have decided to resign as captain. I wish you all good luck at the Classic, kick Claire Young's butt for me okay?" All the girls nodded in response, still too shocked. Brooke squirmed uncomfortably, not sure what else to say, "Well, um, I'll see you guys around." Bevin was the first to speak up and she walked over to Brooke with tears in her eyes, wrapping her arms carefully around her. "I'm going to miss you so much," Bevin cried. "I'm not going anywhere," Brooke replied as she hugged her friend back, "I just won't be on the squad anymore." "It won't be the same… it'll never be the same…" Bevin blubbered. "I know," Brooke said sadly, thinking about graduation in a few months, "I'm going to miss you guys too." The rest of the squad circled around her and they all hugged her, many of them with tears in their eyes.

After a few minutes, Brooke pulled away, trying to keep her emotions in check. She was almost near crying too. Damn her hormones. "Well, it's that time. I better get going. I'll see you guys later okay? And I'll be cheering for you at the Classic." "We'll win it for you, Brooke," Bevin said, "I know how much you've always wanted to win the Classic and beat out Claire Young." The other girls nodded in agreement. "Don't win it for me, win it for yourselves. You deserve it. Each one of you has worked so hard to get to where you are now. If by some chance you don't win, that's okay. You are all winners to me." Tears fell down Bevin's cheeks as she placed both her hands over her heart. Brooke felt uncomfortable again. She didn't know where to end it; she felt like she couldn't leave, couldn't stop saying goodbye. Brooke pretended to look at her watch to see the time, "Wow, I really have to get going. Listen, um, if you see Peyton, could you, um, tell her what I said? Don't… Don't' tell her that I quit because of her, just… tell her it's because of the baby, alright? I'll see you guys later." The other girls voiced their goodbyes as Brooke walked across the gym, waving to them one last time before pushing the doors open and stepping outside.

What Brooke and the girls didn't know though, was that Peyton had arrived a few minutes late to practice but had heard most of what Brooke had said.


End file.
